Goodbye lime green bedroom walls I chose before my adolescent teeth (or head) got straightened out.
Goodbye adopted scrawny cat who pees on my fresh piles of clean clothes. I don’t get why you sleep in the bathtub either, you weirdo.
Goodbye to the freaky life-sized stuffed dog no one loves except my little sister. It’s a poor excuse for the real thing anyway. Dang last dog burned mom’s last bit of hope and decency, and all that’s right in the world.
See you later cat-scratched sofa with the stuffing falling out. Me and my homies crashed there many a night and drooled all over you.
I’ll miss you all!!!
Mom: you gave up on cooking anything really edible for all of us, but I forgive you as long as you crack some walnuts for me when I come home Thanksgiving break.
Dad: you tried ruthlessly to hug me a for reals hug, and it never worked, so maybe I’ll work on giving more back than the awkward side hug next time I see you.
Sister #1: If you move into my room, leave the stuff I don’t take in the closet okay? And if you re-paint the walls, don’t make it stupid. And P.S. you’re on the couch when I come home.
Sister #2: Stop growing so tall, you giant! Stay sweet, white girl. Peace out.
Sister #3: Hey, maybe we can be pen pals… if you’d ever get off the iPad. Oh, okay I’ll FaceTime you. If I have time.
Sayonara, arrivederci, farewell…I’m shoving off for better shores. Luv ya~ wouldn’t want to be ya!
Uhmm…how much money am I getting?