Classic Haiku 古典的ハイク

birds in flight

a furious flight~
sleepy branches will shimmy
slicing through the air

Carpe Diem host Chèvrefeuille invites us to return to where it all began – the roots of haiku, remembering the classical rules of writing it:
1. Describe a moment as short as the sound of a pebble thrown into water (present tense)
2. 5-7-5 syllables
3. Use a kigo (or seasonword)
4. Use a kireji (or cuttingword)
5. Sometimes a deeper spiritual or Zen-Buddhistic meaning
6. First and third line are interchangeable
7. No Self, avoid personal or possessive pronouns (I, me, my); it’s an experience not how the poet feels about it



    • I was walking on the sidewalk and caught sight of a hundred birds leaving a treetop. It sounded like bricks breaking. So many feathers can be furious.

      • Yes, the sudden movement of so many wings—I can hear that. Where I lived about 40 years ago, was at the side of a small mountain. We had a zillion crows who liked to roost on the trees behind the apartment building after feeding at the dump at dusk. I was new to the area and the noise they made was like the sound of a building collapsing. I’ll never forget it. This is about the time I saw the movie The Birds by Alfred Hitchcock. 😉

      • The birds I saw/heard today may have been forewarning to a collapse I later had with my daughter concerning a police officer pulling her over for lack of updated tag sticker. Akk! It was in the console😩

  1. Wait the second line only has 5 syllables? Am I missing something?
    Solar panels high
    Man walking on the rooftop
    Leaves crunch beneath him
    (this was my view of a man on your roof this morning)

    • Running on solar now! They beat the inside job. This is what I want to see in my bathroom: tiles on floor and wall, a water spicket install, gimme back my bath

      • And oops, you’re right on spot. I made a block wall of 5 syllables that needs repairing. Yesterday was terrible.

  2. A haiku as it is meant to be Angie … I am not so of the classical way of writing haiku, but sometimes it’s fun to write haiku according the classical rules.

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