Shrink Wrapped

There are some things you should know before we start. I don’t scare easily and I always get the benefit of the doubt. What people do in public, they do constantly behind closed doors. You think about sex fourteen times a day, but that’s only the half of it. I’m not ready to die, yet I’ll say when it’s my time to go, it’s time.

Study long, study wrong.  Lift with your legs, not with your back.

I commit murder every day, and yes, it’s always someone I know. Your fear in life is being found a counterfeit, a fraud, and that kind of exposure stings more than the sunburns rich white kids get on spring break.

Dogs and babies sniff me out, so I am allergic and clumsy.

I’ve got father issues, mother issues, female issues, but none of that’s any reason to waste a God damned tissue. You think I’m too young to be cynical, but right is right… is right. So let’s wrap this up. Time is money. Money is time.

Tell me something I don’t already know.

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